Scenes #19 and #20 of the first episode was too long and sleepy.
They have been reworked to have more impact.
Some non-essential replicas have been removed, and others shortened.
Some other scenes of the drama need this type of revision.
In their original version, these scenes benefit from a natural flow.
- The 1st risk is therefore to break this flow during the correction.
- The 2nd risk is to have removed a replica that could have been interesting.
- The 3rd risk is not to remove or shorten sufficiently.
- The 4th risk is that we haven't found more interesting ideas.
Below, you can see the original text of these scenes...

# 1

Seoul University of Dramatic Arts, late afternoon.

~ I remind you of 3 essential principles in writing a script.

Conference room.

~ 1st principle, autonomy.

The professor and scriptwriter Song Jae-Jung.

- Let your characters live! First ask yourself what they would do, not you.
- They should not become a substitute for your wishes. Leave this to your audience.
- Sometimes the characters become so sculpted and deep that it is as if they existed of themselves, with all the love of their creator.

- 2nd principle, consistency.
- Do you really believe that spectators do not take this into account?
- In reality, they hate the stupidities that have been served to them for ages, often in Hollywood blockbusters.
- Who has a first aid certificate here?

Many students raise their hands.

- That's a lot of people.
- And what do you think when you see a cliché scene, in which a character gives a cardiac massage on someone who is still breathing?

A student answers.

- Give a cardiac massage, on someone whose heart is beating, causes cardiac arrest.
- That's right, and it's really unbearable to see that.
- Not only is it poorly written, but if ignorant people reproduce this gesture, they could put someone in danger.
- So, consistency in detail, but more importantly, consistency of the scenario as a whole.

- Take for example a story in which the hero poses as dead, after someone tried to murder him.
- He returned to his city a few years later, determined to take revenge.
- To do this, he makes a false identity for himself, although he is barely disguised.
- The city is fuuuuuull of people or relatives who knew him.
- In fact, he might be discovered every 5 minutes!
- It's simple, my 5-year-old nephew is smarter than this hero...
- ...Or than his writer!

An unknown student woman is laughing.

- Seonsaingnim!
- Yes?

The student turns out to be Oh Yeon-Joo!

- I just read a manhwa with this scenario recently.
- Share your feelings with us.
- I loved it!
- There was a terrible suspense when he was going to be recognized by his enemies.
- And it was heartbreaking when he had to pretend to ignore his former fiancée, with whom he is still in love.
- And also, the hero was such a cute Oppa...

(General laughter in the amphitheatre.)

- (Amused) Thank you for your candor and enthusiasm, Oh Yeon-Joo.
- It is undoubtedly for these naive reactions that some scriptwriters give in to the ease.
- But the audience has matured and is more critical, even for fantasy stories.
- We can no longer serve, as in the past, a scenario filled with unbelievable, illogical things out of context.
- And just that....

- 3rd principle, the context.
- Your story takes place in a given environment, such as a police station, factory, or port.
- Investigate this environment thoroughly, and collect the anecdotes that abound.
- You will see that reality is often more extraordinary than what comes out of your imagination.
- It will also give you tons of unexpected ideas, all credible.
- Even in a fiction, the viewer likes to discover a context as sharp as in a documentary.
: Ah, what if I wrote my manhwa script in the hospital environment?
: I would probably have lots of fabulous and realistic stories...
: Surgical operations would have instructive reversals.
: I could even put a character who looks like the Mad Dog in it.
- That will be all for today.

Song Jae-Jung gets up and puts on her coat.

- Please write scenarios that make sense.
- And for suspense or melodrama, brainstorm to stay within a credible context.

(All students together.)

- Yes Seonsaingnim !

(Noise of people picking up their things and leaving the amphitheatre.)

# 2

It's just nightfall on the university campus.

Oh Yeon-Joo is going to the campus.

- Unnie, wait for me!

A student is trying to catch up with her.

- I was sitting next to you during the course.
- Ah, yes.
- The teacher called you Oh Yeon-Joo....
- Yes, it is me.
- The real Oh Yeon-Joo?
- Oh Sung-Moo's daughter, the one he drew in "W"?
- I look like me, don't I?
- You are also pretty.
- It's deabak! I never thought I'd meet you at this script class.
- About the lesson, isn't that a bit rigid as a method?
- Are you kidding, you don't know who the teacher is?
- Song Jae-Jung....
- Is it someone famous?
- Of course, she wrote scripts for TV.
- Super-known dramas like "Queen In-Hyun's man" or "Nine".

The student takes out her smartphone to show the posters.

- Look.

- Oh I see, I rarely watch television.
- She even takes care of the future adaptation of "W" into a drama.
- Gosh... the world is a small place.
- Would you like to have a drink?
- I'm sorry, I have an appointment.
- After maybe? Please, Unnie.
- Then I have to pick up my baby from my mother.
- I had so many questions to ask you.
- We can do that next time. But rather before the class.
- We could make an appointment an hour before. At the local café?
- Yes, let's do that.
- Promised?
- Yes, I promise.